Lindsay Lohan downright lousy in “Labor Pains”
A lot of ink has been spilled over the past couple of years about Lindsay Lohan, and about 10% of it referenced her acting. This may seem unfair and immature, but after the “quality” of Lohan’s work in her latest release Labor Pains, it’s no wonder why magazines are far more interested in her love life than her acting credentials.The plot line seems interesting enough—Lohan is a 20-something woman stuck in a thankless secretarial job at a publishing agency, raising her high-school sister after the death of their parents. She accidentally hurts her boss’ (Chris Parnell) beloved puppy, and to keep from getting fired, she lies and says she’s pregnant. Hijinks and hilarity ensue, right? More like half-hearted acting and a half-baked storyline.
This plot arc is rather unforgivable, if only because of the inane predictability of it. Obviously, there is a certain formula to even the most “offbeat” romantic comedy, but viewers will be able to guess every scene in the movie before it hits the screen. It’s impossible to give away the ending, but just know that it truly is not worth sticking around for.
Plot issues aside though, what’s most unfortunate about the film is how hard the supporting case tries to redeem it—Cheryl Hines offers witty one-liners as Lohan’s sole office ally, Chris Parnell plays the “annoying boss” role perfectly, and Janeane Garafalo even shows up, excelling in a short onscreen stint as a TV talk show host. However, Lohan’s one-dimensional delivery and lackluster attitude brings the entire project down. It’s as if she’s aware that the world thinks she’s just a tabloid queen, yet she has no desire to change that view. As a result, Labor Pains is just that—97 utterly painful minutes.
-Alyssa Vincent, North Central College
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Tags: Cheryl Hines, Chris Parnell, Janeane Garafalo, Labor Pains, Lindsay Lohan